This letter was written by a person incarcerated at Soledad.
Our visits were not reduced — they’ve been terminated. We’ve received no visits since COVID-19. They briefly mentioned virtual visits starting December 19. but to this day, we’ve seen no such movement for so. Because I’ve lost my only hope and drive, visits, it makes this situation that much more unbearable.
A great sense of discouragement to start my day dawns on me to not know how my family, wife, and kids are doing out there.
Mail has always been an issue, and not a guarantee it will be delivered. As I feel this very piece may or may not reach the eyes of the public. It’s always weeks late if it does arrive. We have no means of rehabilitating, no visits, and groups. It’s taken a big effect on my mental state.
Lack of sleep, depression, weight loss, loneliness, and so on.
This pandemic has raised a whole new level of anxiety, and not just to me, but to my loved ones as well. For which they worry about my well being. With all sincerity, I’ve found little to no ways to cope with all this. There’s almost nothing we can do in such a small crowded cell with a cellmate.
There’s only so many conversations to hope we tell each other until it runs out.
Exercise is almost out the window where we can’t even fully extend our arms and legs hardly. And with having your cellmate restricted from moving and staying put in his bunk. With no ventilation the walls get sweaty and lack of showers, it’s unbearable to even do the least of the most common ways to destress — exercise.
An alternative is to write letters but to our dysfunctional mail system it’s a discouragement to sit and write one out. Tents were just recently put in our yard for more positives. And with the new year coming and vaccines available, it just shows us that we will not be getting vaccinated anytime soon.
As of now we are California’s most in positive cases prison facility. With fear amongst our irresponsible staff, and no visits, to lost mail, we are sure to lose more fellow inmates to COVID and easily catch this virus two to three times. This is me after my first positive.
P.S. Thank you so much for the best hopes and wishes. It really means the world to hear that and see people out there voice us and work to try to make a change! “If there’s a will, there’s a way!”
Best wishes.
